I went to the Wednesday evening service at my church tonight. The sermon that the pastor preached tonight spoke to the innermost parts of my heart. My heart overflows. He shared with us this verse and it only shows how much God understands my heart and my longings.
"I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth." 3 John 1:4.
I kept trying to hold back my tears during the service. It was a revelation and my heart was so filled. I realized that my greatest passion in my life are my two boys, Landon and Brady. I have never experienced this volume and depth of love for anything else in my life. I absolutely love and adore my beautiful boys. I am in tears as I write this.
God, maybe being a wife wasn't something I was destined for. Maybe not now, or maybe never. And that's okay. You destined me to become a mother. Landon and Brady were meant to be. You chose me to be their mother and that is the greatest role that anyone can have on Earth. I am SO blessed! I want to invest ALL I have in them. And I will.
When I think about my life and what I would consider to be the greatest achievement of my life. I would say that there would be only one thing that would bring me so much joy, so much purpose and so much triumph and that is for Landon and Brady to walk in the truth. Oh, I'd give it all up. I'd give up all the fancy houses, all the fast cars, all the money in the world, all the college degrees and everything I ever had just for that.
And in making this commitment, I am literally throwing everything that is in my way, OUT. I am throwing out the television. I am throwing out the computer. I am throwing out anything that can be in the way of raising my kids. I am investing all the time I have, all the precious, precious time that I have to raise my boys. I am going to make the most out of the time that I have.
Like the story of the merchant from far away who found a great pearl. He sold everything he had to buy this one great pearl. God gave me two shining, brilliant, amazing pearls. To me, they are worth it all.
This is the greatest desire of my heart. I am weeping as I write this. Oh Lord, thank you for letting me see this opportunity and to feel this blazing in my heart. When you speak to me Lord, my heart blazes with fire from above. Praise the Lord, God Almighty.